I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
There's even glitter on my cock...
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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