He kissed a someone with a penis
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
