yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Randomize
