if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
50% drunk capacity currently
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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