spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
