We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize