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• (248): View more from Michigan

  My new storm is the chrons

  (248): View more from Michigan

  The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one

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• (949): View more from California

  Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?

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• (980): View more from North Carolina

  I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!

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• (207): View more from Maine

  Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me

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• (423): View more from Tennessee

  If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS

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• (360): View more from Washington

  He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?

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• (239): View more from Florida

  Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder

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