So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Randomize
