The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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