the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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