Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
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I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
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But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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