i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize
