How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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