It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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