There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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