he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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