I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
