Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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