I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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