I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize