he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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