I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
