Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
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