my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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