Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
there is glitter all over my balls
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
