was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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