Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
