White coat. Heels.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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