fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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