WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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