party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
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Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize