I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
