im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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