Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
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I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
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You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
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