girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
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