i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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