Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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