Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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