If i could tip my vagina, i would.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
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He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
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We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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