She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
soo... how was my night?
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