If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Randomize
