just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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