awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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