If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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