Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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