Where is the hickey?
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
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Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
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I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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