why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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