how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
it's like iHOP with fire
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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