Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
god, I love you
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
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He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
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oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.