I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
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