Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
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I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
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Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
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